How can we allow teenagers to make their own decisions, when we know what we know?
In this last video in my eight part series with therapist Amy Frisch, we get into some of the reasons why teenagers “twist the truth,” and how we can help them self navigate difficult situations.
What does giving space look like?
Amy talks about how parents need to allow space for teenagers to “do their own work.” She does not mean their schoolwork, she means the work of figuring things out for themselves.
The work of learning who they are and how they can navigate their world to get to their own finish line, (which may be very different from the one their parents might envision for them).
“The best thing we can do with our communication with teenagers when they are in a hard situation… is to help them think it through from lots of different angles and perspectives. Hopefully through that process, they can figure out what the best solution is for them.” - Amy FrischClick To TweetWhy do adults ask kids this?
The comedian Paula Poundstone used to have a line that went something like this, “Why is it that adults love to ask children what they want to be when they grow up? “It’s because they are looking for ideas.” I guess we all have our own journey, but we can all use some ideas along the way.
“Consciously Parenting Teens” Video Series
The video segment above is only 4 minutes and I think it’s worth watching more than once. If you want to see the whole 8 part series then opt-in using the form below.
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An invitation
I invite you to engage in conversation with me in the comments below. I’d love to hear your thoughts, struggles and stories on this topic.

I’m Adam Simon. I started teen camp eighteen years ago with the vision of creating a space where teenagers would know they are safe from bullying or negative judgments and would feel free to show who they really are and to become their best selves. Let’s connect, discuss, engage…